Ring that Bell!

Fisherman’s Wharf, San Fransisco

November 1: Sixth and last chemotherapy treatment! Woohoo!! Got to ring the bell after having my bell rung big time for the last five months. A reason to celebrate. There are reasons to celebrate each day – some big, some small. This was big! Once I get past the post treatment side effects, it was be mostly smoothing sailing, like the ship in the picture on calm water. It will take weeks, maybe even months for side effects to resolve, and some they say never do completely, but I am hoping and believing in miracles. Finding the tumor early was a miracle and there will be more!

I am so thankful for the doctors, nurses, and staff in the infusion center. I always take goodies to treatment and today it was cupcakes. They extend such wonderful care and kindness. I am working at getting better as expressing my thoughts and gratitude toward others. Afterall, others cannot read our minds. But when our hearts are open and we share what is in it, it can create a beautiful exchange, and sometimes a lasting relationship or friendship. It’s simple really…

“Love one another as I have loved you” ~ Jesus (John 13:34)

Larry and I had the consult with the surgeon this week. She could not feel the tumor! Bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction are scheduled for December 12th. Both female surgeons and I have been told by several that they are excellent surgeons. I will be in good hands. But I know this will be a tough one – physically and emotionally. I have lots of thoughts and have had plenty of learning experiences around body image and some not so wise choices. I will share in a blog before or after surgery. Where I will get painfully honest about vanity and past decisions. That will not be easy for me! It is not easy to bare ourselves to others, is it? To express our innermost thoughts and feelings. To expose our mistakes and regrets. But there is blessing and healing in doing so – for ourself and others. It’s easy to be guarded and to skim the surface. It’s risky to be lay ourselves open: “What if they don’t understand? What if they judge me? Maybe they will love me less”. But it is in the deep dives with each other where the magic and real love happens!